King Me
(Published in Jubilee City, 2005)

Hey Mike, this is Richard. Jim King is in my place next door and he’s drunk and he’s trying to rape Miriam.”
Richard called from Houston to New York to tell Mike that Miriam is next door in his apartment there in New York and is in trouble.
“That slut is asking for it” Mike said.
“Yeah but he won’t leave her alone. Just go over there and throw him out.” Richard pleaded.
“Fuck Richard!” Mike said. He hung up and picked up a 36-inch heavy duty stretcher bar and went next door.
Miriam and Jim both look drunk.
Miriam said “Tell Jim to leave, Mike.”
Mike said “Richard called from Houston and begged me to come over here to ask you to leave, Jim. So please leave.”
Jim King was a funny looking kind like Graucho Marx without the mustache.
He was a drunk and could speak Russian. He worked close by in Wall Street and hung out with Richard and Miriam at McGovern’s bar. He had a good job, so she always let him buy her drinks.
Now he wanted sex.
So here mike came to the rescue.
“You want to make me?” Jim asked as he walked fast toward mike, mike swung the heavy duty Utrecht stretcher bar made of pine hard across Jim’s left shoulder. Thud.
That Knocked Jim to his knees, stunned.
Mike backed up and yelled “Get out Jim!”
Jim stood and then charged Mike like a bull.
Mike swung hard again and downward. He hit a line drive across Jims left temple.
SPLAT! A sick sound.
It spun Jim all the way around and straightened him up like a dancer, then he landed flat on his back with a loud, deep thump.
Before he could move Mike laid the bar across Jim’s neck and put his knees on it and pressed down.
All Mike had to do was shift his weight on the board and it would be sayonara Jim King.
Jims face was red and he was chocking.
They were near the door and Mike told Miriam to open the door as he was scooting Jim out.
Inch by inch on his back.
Jim stunk and Mike was looking into Jims red face. Mike was way closer to this guy than he ever wanted to be.
Mike sees the big bloody welt on the side of his face and smells his bad smell.
Jim struggled, so Mike pressed down with more weight from his knees.
He cut off Jim’s air. When Jim stopped struggling Mike let up just a little. Jim could breathe again, then Jim diverted his eyes from Mike to his shoulders and said in a raspy voice,
“Mike you’re really not that strong.”